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We were never married — what are my rights after separation (samenwonen)?

FamilyLegislation verified on Ook in het Nederlands

Rights after separation for unmarried cohabitants (samenwonen) in the Netherlands

In short: Dutch law gives unmarried cohabitants far fewer automatic rights than married couples or registered partners. There is no default community of property, no automatic right to partner maintenance, and no automatic right to stay in the family home. What each partner brought in remains theirs, and what you can claim depends mainly on (i) what you agreed in writing (typically a samenlevingscontract), (ii) who paid for what, and (iii) general property and contract law.

The starting point: everything stays private

Unmarried cohabitation creates no legal community of property. This is confirmed by case law (notably the Supreme Court's ruling of 10 May 2019, ECLI:NL:HR:2019:631) and is now the undisputed position: the marital property rules in Boek 1 BW (Articles 1:93–1:113, including the default community in Article 1:94) do not apply to ongehuwd samenwonenden. Each partner keeps their own assets and debts, and you cannot claim half of what the other owns simply because you lived together.

Property, the home, and "vergoedingsrechten"

If the home is in one partner's name, the other partner has no ownership claim based on the relationship itself. However, two routes can give a financial claim:

RouteStatutory basisWhen it applies
Onverschuldigde betalingArticle 6:203 BWYou paid for something on the home or in the other partner's name without a legal ground to do so
Ongerechtvaardigde verrijkingArticle 6:212 BW (and Article 6:78 BW for non-attributable non-performance)The other partner was enriched at your expense without a legal ground
Contractual vergoedingsrechtenThe samenlevingscontractYou agreed in writing on a repayment or compensation formula (e.g. periodic income equalisation, exit payment, mortgage contributions)

Without written agreements and without payment receipts, it is in practice very hard to claim compensation. Courts will look at bank statements, mortgage deeds, the BRP registration, and any written exchange between the partners.

The rental home

The strong tenant protections in Boek 7 BW do not give an unmarried partner an automatic right to stay.

  • Article 7:266 BW (automatic medehuur for the spouse/registered partner) does not apply to unmarried cohabitants.
  • Article 7:267 BW allows a partner who has had a duurzame gemeenschappelijke huishouding with the tenant for at least two years to ask the court to be appointed co-tenant. The court weighs this against the landlord's interests and may refuse if the request appears aimed only at obtaining a tenant position.
  • Article 7:268 lid 2 BW protects the surviving unmarried partner on the death of the tenant: they can continue the lease for six months and ask the court for longer continuation.

For a purchased home in one partner's name, the other partner has no automatic right to stay either. Negotiated departure, with possible compensation for mortgage payments and improvements, is the standard outcome.

Partner maintenance (partneralimentatie)

There is no statutory right to partner maintenance for an unmarried cohabitant after separation. Article 1:160 BW is often misunderstood in this context: it only ends an existing alimony obligation when the recipient starts a new relationship "as if married", and Article 1:84 BW (proportional contribution to household costs) only applies to echtgenoten. A maintenance obligation can only arise from what you agreed in the samenlevingscontract, or from a successful ongerechtvaardigde verrijking claim.

Pension (partnerpensioen)

There is no automatic partner pension for unmarried cohabitants. The Pensioenwet and most pension regulations require both partners to be married or in a registered partnership. For unmarried partners, the pension fund typically requires:

  1. A notarial samenlevingscontract, and
  2. The partner to be registered with the pension fund.

Under the Wet toekomst pensioenen (in force from the transition date of each scheme), even unmarried partners without a notarial contract may qualify if they can show a gezamenlijke huishouding, but each scheme's rules differ. On separation, the bijzonder partnerpensioen that was built up during the relationship can remain with the ex-partner; this too is rule-dependent.

Children

The parents' marital status does not change the rights of the children.

  • Both parents remain liable for kinderalimentatie (Articles 1:392–1:401 BW). The contribution is calculated according to the tremanormen and is not affected by whether the parents ever married.
  • Joint parental authority (gezamenlijk gezag) can be obtained via erkenning by the father, and from2023 unmarried fathers automatically obtain joint authority if the child was born on or after 1 July 2023 and the father recognises the child before birth.
  • A child who lives with a parent and earns income from work is obliged to contribute to the household costs naar draagkracht under Article 1:253l BW.

Inheritance

Without a testament, an unmarried partner inherits nothing under Dutch succession law (Articles 4:10 and 4:11 BW). Unmarried partners are not among the statutory heirs and only inherit if named in a will. They also do not benefit from the partnervrijstelling in the erfbelasting unless they were registered as fiscal partners (which itself requires a notarial samenlevingscontract and joint BRP registration).

The role of the samenlevingscontract

Because so little is automatic, the notarial samenlevingscontract is the main tool to organise the consequences of separation. Common clauses cover:

  • Who owns what (private vs. joint) and how income is shared.
  • How the home is financed, in what shares, and what happens on departure (sale, buy-out, use right).
  • Compensation for contributions to the other's property.
  • Pension designation and equalisation.
  • Whether and how long one partner may remain in the home after separation.
  • Whether (limited) maintenance is agreed and for how long.
  • A verblijvingsbeding for jointly owned household goods (this can only transfer jointly acquired items, not private property).
  • Designation as fiscal partners (requires the notarial form and joint BRP address).

Without such a contract, your position depends almost entirely on what you can prove in documents and bank records.

Quick comparison of the typical situation

TopicMarried / registered partnersUnmarried cohabitants
Community of propertyYes, by default (Art. 1:94 BW)No
Co-tenant by operation of lawYes (Art. 7:266 BW)No (request under Art. 7:267 BW)
Right to stay in family home on divorceYes, court can assignNo automatic right
Partner maintenance after separationYes (Art. 1:157 BW)No, unless contracted
Pension equalisationYes (Wet verevening pensioenrechten)Only what is agreed and registered
Statutory inheritanceYes (Art. 4:10 BW)No, only via testament
Fiscal partnershipAutomatic on marriageOnly with notarial contract + same address

Practical checklist

  1. Gather all written agreements, including any informal e-mails and the samenlevingscontract if any.
  2. Collect bank and mortgage records, payment receipts, and proof of contributions to the home.
  3. Check the BRP registration dates.
  4. Check whether the pension fund was notified of the partner.
  5. Act quickly: claims based on ongerechtvaardigde verrijking and onverschuldigde betaling have a five-year limitation period (Articles 3:310 and 3:311 BW).

Disclaimer

This article is a general overview of current Dutch law and is not legal advice. Your specific situation may turn on facts and on the exact wording of any agreements you made. For decisions with significant financial consequences, consult a familierechtadvocaat or samenlevingsnotaris.

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